Ari Fitz is a social media and TV personality, model, filmmaker, and writer. She co-runs the Instagram account @the.tomboyish, produced My Mama Wears Timbs, a documentary about a masculine-of-center mom-to-be, and is the mastermind behind WEDGE, a webcomic about an incarcerated teen named Ace. On top of that, Ari’s YouTube channel has over 237,000 subscribers to date. Her work defies the gender binary and emanates pure black girl magic. We had the lucky opportunity to photograph and interview her for Posture. Read on below to learn all about her creative projects, relationship to social media, and how she learned to believe in herself, above all else.
Jumpsuit: Yohji Yamamoto / Shoes: Dieppa Restrepo
“It’s almost like the world was waiting for me to accept myself truly and honestly before they could accept me.”
What are some things you’d like folks to know about you — who is Ari Fitz?
She’s imperfect, androgynous, at times fashionable, and on a mission to tell real, authentic, inclusive, nuanced stories. She wants to tell stories that would make her 13-year-old self know that everything’s going to be fine after all. She’s also a model, a YouTuber, a comic book creator and filmmaker trying really hard.
What was your journey like towards “mega influencer” status as a queer, black androgynous person?
My journey has been a wild one. It’s hella cool that I gained influence after I stopped downplaying all those things about me. The world started to admire me more the moment I stopped downplaying my androgyny, downplaying my queerness, downplaying my quirkiness and so on. It’s almost like the world was waiting for me to accept myself truly and honestly before they could accept me.
Jacket: Philip Lim / Top: Katr Dobrrkova / Pants: Stylist’s own
That’s really powerful — was there a specific moment in time — like a, “damn, maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on myself” moment that helped you come into your own?
This is a tough question, as I think I have the, “I shouldn’t be so hard on myself,” moment daily. Nothing specific comes to mind, but I will say realizing that everyone has their own internal struggles woke me up and helped me see myself more fully. Also, seeing that my heroes still had shit they had to work through helped me get out of my head. The word “imperfect” floats around my head a lot lately. I like it, I like that I’m imperfect. I like that my friends are imperfect, and my mom, and my girlfriend, and the characters I create.
What is the inspiration behind your comic book, WEDGE?
WEDGE was inspired by my black queer intimacy project with Christine Ting. I desperately wanted to tell a fantasy love story with black queer characters. Problem was I didn’t — and don’t — have fantasy love story movie coin so I decided to turn it into a five-part webcomic. I released the first comic book on January 31st and plan to release the second book later this month. There are five total within the whole story.
I consider the whole project my own personal practice in learning to tell fantasy and science fiction stories — something I’m really interested in. It’s hella fun and I can’t wait until the full story is complete and online.
You’re right — like now, in the age of Black Panther, there’s still a lack of stories where we see queer people as heroes. I’m thinking about that deleted scene in the movie where Ayo, one of the Dora Milaje, flirts with Okoye…and it’s like, damn, if we can’t have queer folks in Wakanda, in a movie based on afrofuturism, then where can we?
That.
Was WEDGE the first story you wrote, or do you have others you’re working on?
Bruh, I have so many canned projects. So many short films I’ve written, stories I’ve written, things I’ve never released, things I’ve half-assed released. There are so, so many. I’m working on being more thoughtful about what I put out now, but it drives me crazy because there’s nothing more addicting than watching one of my projects come to life and reach the world.
On your canned projects — that’s so real. On the flip side, how do you feel about this whole idea of content pushing — where folks feel pressured through social media to just put their work out there without thinking it through?
Yes! I think it’s so woven into the fabric of this kind of work. I earn a living from consistently posting YouTube videos, Instagram photos, et cetera. If I don’t regularly do so, my numbers will go down and my rent won’t get paid, which like…sucks. If I could release myself from needing to constantly push things and to plan more larger releases, I’d be a much happier person.
At the same time, I have a very physical addiction to posting online. I experience a wave of excitement, anxiety, and panic. I get so nervous. “Will they like it? Will they like me?” That pisses me off, but is still very present.
What you named as an addiction is backed by science. Apparently every “like” on social media releases dopamine, which is tied directly to the part of our brains that control pleasure. Also, I think folks assume the “influencer” lifestyle is this easy thing to do, and it doesn’t seem like that’s even remotely correct.
I’ve actually had a really hard life up until this point. I had to grow up fast and think about adult shit very early on. If now my biggest struggle is a dependency on social media, I’d say I’m winning, you know? Fuck it, lemme collect that dopamine and look fly while I do it.
My childhood was stolen from me and now I’m stealing it back with every story, every post, every goofy YouTube video. I can act like a kid and dream like a kid for the first time in my life. I’m good for real.
On that note, do you have advice for creatives who feel pressured to just keep creating?
Don’t make your passion your job too early. It compromises your work.
“Don’t make your passion your job too early.” I felt that in my soul. Is there a lesson in that message? Did you try something “too soon” and had it not work out as well as you would have wanted it to?
I’ve hopped in too soon on every damn thing, including what I do now. The thing that I hate and love about myself is I tend to go all in with my work. I place my blinders on and keep running until I lose my breath or all my money.
Google “genjuice, arielle patrice scott” and you’ll find an entire era of my life where I didn’t know what I was doing or what I was building — but I believed in myself more than anything. I’ve made so many mistakes, but my girl says her favorite thing about me is that I always believe in myself. I like that about me, too. That said, if I could do it all over again, I’d believe a taddddd less and be a little more hesitant to go all or nothing on something.
It’s either a serious character flaw that will leave me broken forever or something that will put my name in history books, I can’t see any in between to be honest. Only time will tell where I land.
Top: Issey Miyake / Pants: COMME des GARCONS
How did the Instagram Tomboyish come about?
I was on Real World a few years back and I got into a fight with my girlfriend on the show. The fight was about how I dress, how I was changing my style a lot and becoming more masculine. The internet really stood behind me and it showed me how much folks needed content for masculine of center women, tomboys, dykes, etc. I hoped TOMBOYISH would fill that void and it’s been a fun ride ever since.
I’ve abandoned it many times in favor of shiny new projects, but I’m working on doing something really great for it in the coming months.
Since you brought up “new projects,” is it too late to ask about your goals for 2018? I haven’t been able to figure out if everyone’s collectively over it or not.
Oh nah, I think about this stuff daily. I have a sticky note on my computer reminding myself of the goals I have. I’ve had to adjust them a bit, but they’re still staying. Oddly enough, I got an email from NYLON a few days after I wrote down I wanted a cover, so I think they’re important.
My big 2018 goal is to write and star in an award-winning short film, but we shall see what happens by December – and if I was too busy keeping my posts consistent to do something impactful.
Top: Issey Miyake / Pants: COMME des GARCONS / Shoes: Issey Miyake
Describe a regular day in your life.
Want the truth? Every morning I wake up and decide what I want to do, and if that ain’t freedom I don’t know what is. Sometimes it’s work on my web comic, sometimes it’s work on a script, sometimes I have networks or brands or agents or someone in my inbox that wants something from me and I decide if I want to give it to them. Sometimes I want to see people, sometimes I just wanna dance naked in my spot…it’s on me. I decide.
The only consistent thing is I tend to take a shower and as the steam builds up, I thank my god for giving me this freedom.
Oh, and I masturbate nearly every day. Some self-care shit.
Follow Ari on Instagram: @itsarifitz
Editorial Credits:
Author: Shaira Chaer
Producer: Winter Mendelson
Photographer: Lauren Perlstein
Senior Photo Director: Asher Torres
Creative Director: Morgan T. Stuart
Stylist: Paris Roman, garments courtesy of andARCHIVE
Makeup: Slater Stanley
Hair: Josh Nyitray
Location: Beyond Studios
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