Author | Lisa Markuson
If you’re into sex at all, in any form, with anyone, for any purpose, you should put Catalyst Con on your radar. I used to think I was “into sex.” I’m like, the fun, non-judgemental friend that you can tell about your relationship problems or your terrible sex or your amazing orgiastic experiences and I won’t bat an eye. In fact, I’ll probably give you tips for next time. I used to think I… you know… knew stuff.
Then I went to Catalyst Con.
Boy, was I in over my head. All of the 70+ speakers and 400+ attendees at the Crystal City sex conference were experts, sexperts, sexologists, sex toy inventors, porn stars, porn directors, erotica writers, doctors, pagan shamans, sex therapists, ecosexuals, evolutionary psychologists, podcasters, educators, sex party hosts, theorists, activists, poets, writers… The community of people studying, exploring, and teaching every aspect of human sexuality is astounding in its diversity, vibrancy, and wait a second.
Why should it be so astounding?
Why should there not be a large, educated, expert group of people doing experiments, pushing boundaries, and developing education, economies, and communities around sexuality? Is it not the main purpose of our existence? The thing that drives us to compete, achieve, protect, cherish, and at the extremes, create and destroy life?
Have you ever thought about what it means to have a serious disability and have sex?
Have you thought about how scientists cut out EVERY non heteronormative person from any study about human sexuality, because their data “creates noise” in their findings?
Why does the media seem obsessed with sex, but always portray it so negatively?
Is porn basically a de facto “sex ed” for most American youth?
Why don’t they teach you about pleasure when they teach about sex in school?
Is it gay if you’re girlfriend puts on a strap-on and pegs you?
Is it consent if it is non-verbal?
Is promiscuity a virtue or a vice?
How can you use art to shape your community into a sex-positive and inclusive environment?
If Betty Dodson had never lived, would women even know what their vaginas look like?
All of these probing (HA!) questions, and many more, were discussed and debated this weekend in the Hilton in Crystal City. It was stunning. We took a break on Saturday for an outdoor Mexican brunch, and our table neighbors were seven drunk postmasters from Boston, in DC for their annual national postmaster convention. When they found out we were at a sex conference they were thrilled beyond reason, but also completely and utterly baffled. What could we possibly be DOING there? An easier question would have been what we weren’t doing, which was leaving any stone unturned. No holds barred.
As with all things worth learning, it seems that studying the intersecting infinite realms of the internal-external and physical-spiritual only brings up more questions, made all the more urgent by their glaring lack in the mainstream consciousness. Catalyst Con may not have all the answers, but at least it is asking the right questions.
Oh, and I totally pinched Betty Dodson’s nipple. And she loved it.
